Here's my advice.

Walk down your driveway till you get to the paved road. Remove your shirt, fold and place it at the end of your driveway. Run at a full sprint down the center of the road until you reach maximum speed then quickly dive to the pavement keeping the body as parallel to the road surface as possible.

Come back and tell us if you still want a bike.

There are only two types of bike owners, those that have laid them down and those that will.