Hay was up im new
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Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 4,840
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Re: Hay was up im new
Originally Posted by montman
OMGOMG you should totally put a period or even try to hit return in your super duper long sentence otherwise it will just run on and on and go one like this forever and perhaps you will get flamed yourself and no one really wants that do they no probably not anyways im am really bored at work today its almost time for the 3 day weekend yay it will be nice to be off work maybe you get the point now k and dont forget welcome to dragva ok bye for now montman out
I Used Condom #6969
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 2,527
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From: Chesapeake
Re: Hay was up im new
Originally Posted by blaxican25
My wife won't let me use natural enhancements anymore, since I took a pill of Viagra and almost caused her to need a hysterectomy. Something about severe uterine bruising.
She's calling you from my phone. She checks to see what bitches have been calling me during the day and she calls them late at night to tell them to stay the hell away. I guess she figures since you call begging for me cock 20 times a day, you must be a woman. Sadly enough, she says you're still awake at 3AM wearing your father's lingerie and masturbating to pictures of Bea Arthur wearing a strap on.
She's calling you from my phone. She checks to see what bitches have been calling me during the day and she calls them late at night to tell them to stay the hell away. I guess she figures since you call begging for me cock 20 times a day, you must be a woman. Sadly enough, she says you're still awake at 3AM wearing your father's lingerie and masturbating to pictures of Bea Arthur wearing a strap on.
And I haven't seen your mom in a while, so she sent me a picture to whack off to when I'm lonely at night . . .
. . . but she said that if you gave me any trouble just remind you who the first person she used that strap on with was and ask why you never peeked at your sister in the shower again after that night . . .
#XV
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 17,570
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From: Norfolk
Re: Hay was up im new
Originally Posted by Anubis
Tell her to quit lying to you man. It wasn't my father's lingerie, it was HERS. It's not my problem they make your wife's g-strings out of retired sumo uniforms but damnit when a 300-lb horny bitch tells you to put on her panties or she's gonna sit on your face, you listen!
And I haven't seen your mom in a while, so she sent me a picture to whack off to when I'm lonely at night . . . . . . but she said that if you gave me any trouble just remind you who the first person she used that strap on with was and ask why you never peeked at your sister in the shower again after that night . . .
And I haven't seen your mom in a while, so she sent me a picture to whack off to when I'm lonely at night . . .
. . . but she said that if you gave me any trouble just remind you who the first person she used that strap on with was and ask why you never peeked at your sister in the shower again after that night . . .Sadly enough, of the millions of loads she's swallowed or farted out, you dad had to be the one unlucky bastard to fall in to that cavernous snatch of hers and rub a last one out before the mutated crabs devoured his boil covered carcass.
By the way, that picture you've been masturbaing to is actually your long lost paternal grandmother....or father. They never could tell, but social services thought it best that you should see him/her before he/she died of AIDS.
I Used Condom #6969
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 2,527
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From: Chesapeake
Re: Hay was up im new
Originally Posted by blaxican25
Tell me about it, I had to harpoon your mother in her barrel shaped leg to keep her away from me. I had stopped at the gas station and she was turning tricks for twinkies. She just wouldn't accept the fact that even my upgraded suspension couldn't handle her ass leaning over my car, I didn't want her cleavage sweat dripping into fucking window, and as bad has her gasping, wheezing breath smelled, I wasn't going to let her any where near my cock (although, I'm sure with her legendary ability to swallow entire cooked pigs whole, she might be the only woman who could deepthroat me).
Sadly enough, of the millions of loads she's swallowed or farted out, you dad had to be the one unlucky bastard to fall in to that cavernous snatch of hers and rub a last one out before the mutated crabs devoured his boil covered carcass.
By the way, that picture you've been masturbaing to is actually your long lost paternal grandmother....or father. They never could tell, but social services thought it best that you should see him/her before he/she died of AIDS.
Sadly enough, of the millions of loads she's swallowed or farted out, you dad had to be the one unlucky bastard to fall in to that cavernous snatch of hers and rub a last one out before the mutated crabs devoured his boil covered carcass.
By the way, that picture you've been masturbaing to is actually your long lost paternal grandmother....or father. They never could tell, but social services thought it best that you should see him/her before he/she died of AIDS.
Poor bastard didn't know what he was getting into when he tried to grab a twinkie on his way out . . . the last time I heard a man scream like that was when I was hiding in the closet when you came home early from work - who would have known your wife could get that broomstick all the way in your ass? I almost shed a tear for you man, I'm surprised you didn't hear me laughing so hard . . .
So the picture of your mother was also the picture of my father? Wouldn't that mean than your father fucked my father and that's where you came from? I thought ass babies where a thing of the future . . . congratulations on being a pioneer! Since I guess that somehow makes you my brother, why don't we just put all this behind us, and I'll buy you a round.
I Used Condom #6969
Joined: Sep 2003
Posts: 2,527
Likes: 0
From: Chesapeake
Re: Hay was up im new
Originally Posted by VR-4ever
If that was round one, Blaxican just KO'd you.
#XV
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 17,570
Likes: 0
From: Norfolk
Re: Hay was up im new
Originally Posted by Anubis
That's strange, she doesn't usually pull the "rhinocerous car charge" unless the ice cream man forgets to turn off his jingle in my neighborhood. I'm sorry my mom attacked your car, she's always had a thing for dreads - ever since she brought your dad home that night she's been obsessed - I guess you kind of look like him, but then, you wouldn't know that since I'm the only one of us who's ever met the guy.
Poor bastard didn't know what he was getting into when he tried to grab a twinkie on his way out . . . the last time I heard a man scream like that was when I was hiding in the closet when you came home early from work - who would have known your wife could get that broomstick all the way in your ass? I almost shed a tear for you man, I'm surprised you didn't hear me laughing so hard . . .
So the picture of your mother was also the picture of my father? Wouldn't that mean than your father fucked my father and that's where you came from? I thought ass babies where a thing of the future . . . congratulations on being a pioneer! Since I guess that somehow makes you my brother, why don't we just put all this behind us, and I'll buy you a round.
Poor bastard didn't know what he was getting into when he tried to grab a twinkie on his way out . . . the last time I heard a man scream like that was when I was hiding in the closet when you came home early from work - who would have known your wife could get that broomstick all the way in your ass? I almost shed a tear for you man, I'm surprised you didn't hear me laughing so hard . . .
So the picture of your mother was also the picture of my father? Wouldn't that mean than your father fucked my father and that's where you came from? I thought ass babies where a thing of the future . . . congratulations on being a pioneer! Since I guess that somehow makes you my brother, why don't we just put all this behind us, and I'll buy you a round.
